26: Mary Beth LaRue – Creating Room for Embracing Vulnerability & Love

We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy. – Pema Chödrön

Mary Beth Larue’s professional passion is teaching yoga, meditation, mentoring and writing. She is the co-founder of the movement, Rock Your Bliss.  But it’s her soulful journey as a foster mom that has exposed her to wholehearted love and presence. For the past eleven months, she and her husband (7: Matt Aporta – Fostering Love) have fostered-to-adopt a beautiful little baby boy. They have opened themselves to the continually changing, dynamic nature of of vulnerability with a brutally exposed open and full heart. They have accepted that people might be temporary in your life, but that is not in your control.  What is in your control is the deliberate and passionate love shared in the moment, everyday.

Mary Beth is not who she is because she fosters. She fosters because of who she is.  Through the darkness, she has learned to focus on the light. She has learned to hold herself accountable for her thoughts, because they create her reality.  She has conversations full of possibilities, love and vulnerability. Her focus is on the now. Owning our story is hard, but not as difficult as running from it.  That strength, that vulnerability, privilege,and love, is what this episode is about.

SHOW NOTES:

Intro: Pema Chodron – When Things Fall Apart: Heartfelt Advice for Hard Times.

6:40  How to slow down. The moment is enough.

13:00  How to shine light on yourself in the darkness.

14:00  Relationship with Social Media – Perspective

27:00  What to do when starting to feel down.

29:03*  Holding myself accountable for thoughts that I’m thinking and whats coming out of my mouth because its creating my whole reality. I get to have conversations full of possibilities. Where as before I was having conversations with a giant stop sign.

29:47  A warrior is skilled in action and non-action. Vulnerability is Strength. The strength to allow yourself to feel.

35:00  The identity and transition in becoming a mom.

Fostering Baby A

47:00  Seeking the light in the face of loss.

48:53*  I’m different now because we’re willing to put ourselves in the fire. I want my heart to be all used up. I want ever inch of my heart and my spirit to have been used and grown and transformed because whats the point otherwise.

We get the privilege of making an impact in a child’s life, but mainly get the privilege of this child making a massive impact in our life.

58:20  How to become more self-aware so you can self-regulate.

1:07:50  Grief and Emotion is love. How to learn from kids.

1:14:20  Solitude is a super power. Micro Meditation.

1:18:00  The Yoga Room

1:22:30  Meditation and Breath work – It makes you kinder.

Mantras: Be fully present. Feel your heart. Engage in the next moment without any agenda.

1:35:03  What has yoga taught you? Being present. Finding peace in the chaos.

1:41:26  A letter from her husband. Gratitude, Intention, Love

LINKS:

MaryBethLarue.com     RockYourBlissMovement.com    TheSisuWay.com

SOCIAL MEDIA:

@marybethlarue  @rockyourbliss  @1scottmcgee  @TheSisuWay

24: Ryan Fischer – Strength, Work Ethic, & Reflection

Ryan Fischer has off the charts fitness, numerous feats of physical strength, and experience in helicopter flying, Olympic skeleton, BMX racing, competitive CrossFitting, and hiking all over the world.  His life is a set of circumstances that have developed him into a fulfilled gym owner.  But his biggest strength is his drive and his work ethic, and Ryan is more than a competitor or gym owner.

This episode is more than what his bio says.  This episode is about the man you think you know as Ryan Fischer. We had the chance to dive deep into Ryan’s life on a level you have never heard before. This episode goes beyond fitness as we reflect on where Ryan’s drive comes from, his relationship with his family, how he always knew he was different, what makes him happy, and where his unconquerable soul comes from.  This isn’t an episode I took lightly. I wanted to offer a platform of reflection and growth through a respectful path of vulnerability and strength. This special episode was an honor for me to record. I humbly thank you for choosing this to listen to with a special thank you to Ryan’s mom, Kim.

With gratitude,

Scott McGee

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Show Notes:

Short story:  The Cracked Pot

4:32  What is stronger? Your muscles or your work ethic.

10:36  To find your work ethic, does it need to found through physical effort?  Moments that forced you to be strong.

A story of a Son.

13:43  I never really had that dad feeling and because of that I searched for different things to put energy into that couldn’t be bought. You cant get it any other way except for super hard work. If I did that, I created that and it made me feel good.

Finding out some big news at 18 that changed everything.

22:30  I remember always telling my mom that there was something about me that was different. I knew that I was going to be different. I always knew it.

23:00  First contacts with real dad.

30:30  Raising money for Olympics.  The biggest check Ryan had ever received.

The $500 check.

33:20  The grandparents

37:40  Everybody has a struggle. Everyone has a deal going on. But there’s always room for a heart to heart conversation between a father and son. -SM

38:33  Do you think finding out made you a stronger person?

40:00  Reflection on life and relationships.

41:04  What do you think your mom is most proud about you? A conversation with mom.

(Ryan’s mom): He never followed the crowd. He stayed true to himself and his values.

Where does Ryan’s drive come from? And how his drive is a weakness.

49:30  What makes Ryan happy?

58:00  “Settling down” and relationships.

1:04:30*  What is your inner conversation like during a workout?

Once everything starts to hurt, we just started working out. Let’s go to work.

Little cues to help push through the work out.

1:10:20  The Little Man Story

1:14:10  How memory retention works. 

1:16:11  The CrossFit drive that transcends and the ripple effects.

Two things that define you.  Your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything.

Happiness vs Fulfilled

Planting the seed of gratitude is in someone else’s couch. -SM

1:28:09  Military dreams. How training to be a Nazy Seal led Ryan to CrossFit.

1:37:00  Wim Hof, Ice Baths, Float Tanks, Saunas

1:42:00  Being dedicated to action and non-action.  How to destress.

Self-Awareness and Self-Regulation

1:48:14  What has hosting a podcast taught you?

2:01:15  Ryan’s online programming

You don’t see a moving truck behind a Hearse. 

Links:

@RyanFisch  @1ScottMcGee @CrossFitChalk  @TheSisuWay

CrossFitChalk.com    TheSisuWay.com

22: Kenny Kane – A Path of Joy, Suffering, & Effort.

 

The Sisu Way is defined as strength and determination in the face of adversity. Persistence. Hope. GRIT. An unbeatable mindset full of courage, tenacity, resilience, willpower, triumph, and an unconquerable soul. They say the finest souls are those who gulped pain and avoided making others taste it.  Well ladies and gentlemen, that is my brother and esteemed guest, Kenny Kane. 

Kenny Kane is lighthouse to many of us, but even lighthouses have shadows.  If strength is a product of suffering and struggle, then Kenny is by far one of the strongest people I know.  He has faced a massive amount emotional trauma and death packed on top of each other.  He was force fed a beautifully violent lesson in the balance of life and death.  In the face of this much pain and chaos, how do you do the most good?  How can we use our resources to be in service to something greater than ourselves?

If there is a lesson I have learned from late world-class Coach Marion Kane Elston through her son Kenny, it is you have to be willing to get up strong each and every time without complaint.  You have to put in the effort and open yourself up to the experience, or the time won’t come.

This episode was an honor for me record, but the real honor was the vulnerable and heartfelt conversation.  Kenny is one of the best humans I know. I’m proud to call him my friend and a mentor.  This episode is dedicated to the Kane family.

Get Up Strong.

Humbly,

Scott McGee

Show Notes:

Three Marbles – W.E. Peterson

5:00  Oak Park LA Bio and intro

10:44 Introduction to hosting podcasts

14:00 First Question – There is no elegant answer.  It’s complicated. It’s a journey.

15:30  Birth of son followed by death of mom

Challenges outpacing capabilities

21:55  Pillars of Good and Pillars of Strength have shadows

23:22  Most valuable currency – Ability to Connect

25:20  Leaving a Legacy – Kane Family

37:00  Story of Effort – If you don’t open yourself up to experience, the time wont come.

41:35  What is it about your mom that you would want your kids to know?  Her willingness to get up every single time without complaint. What it means to be a Kane. Grit.

41:15  Revisiting the struggle of life and death

51:20  History of stand up comedy career and intention

52:50  Where are you finding resilience while doing the most good?

53:30*  Purpose

57:30  12 more deaths over 14 more months – intense cadence

1:00:20  How do you do the most good when faced with only right and wrong answers?

Are your actions contributing to the joy of the world or the misery?

Sacrifice Rejected

1:08:00  Talia

1:12:50  Justine – The silent walk – The 7 year old leader

1:20:08  VUCA – The world is volatile, uncertain, complex, ambiguous

1:21:10  The wildfires – Original Oak Park

1:29:30  Navy Commander Schultze band reference of vision, reality, and truth.

1:43:00 The passing of the torch – Becoming the patriarch

1:46:26  Slow down to move fast. Grinding, enduring, grit, and the shadows.

1:48:40  Attention and purpose – profession and family

1:54:20  (extra credit) Social Media and mind control

1:59:20  Student/Magician named Tristan Harris – Attention Economy – impressions and screen time – Time Well Spent

2:28:40  Restoration through fitness, breath work, writing everyday, therapy, and patience. Being okay with the scars and path.

Links:

The Sisu Way Team for Whole Life Challenge

Body of Knowledge  Oak Park LA

TED Talk – Tristan Harris

kenny@oakparkla.com

The Sisu Way

20: Logan Gelbrich – Awareness & Vulnerability on a path to Hold the Standard

Before recording this episode with world-class human Logan Gelbrich, Dr. Cara Miller had some advice for me. She said, “Hold him steady with love – Push him deep with humility – and be willing to go there with him courageously.” 

This episode is a journey into the man, not just the entrepreneur/coach.  We learn how awareness is a good and bad thing, what the cost of seeking adversity is, and that strengths have shadows.  Most people think the ability to endure is a good thing, but what are the consequences of that?  Can you choose your way to happiness?

There is something about Logan that makes us want to get better.  He is someone I admire as a friend and revere as a leader. On the inside he is an intuitive and introspective soul with deep and complex thoughts.  On the outside he is a world renowned leader who is pushing us to “hold the responsibility of the space between your reality and the standard and that never ending pursuit of it.”

It is my humble honor to present this deeply personal interview with my friend, Logan,  with love and respect.

Strength is a Choice,

Scott McGee

Show Notes:

Antonio Machado said: Traveler, there is no path. The path is made by walking.

“It would be a ridiculous coincidence if your life was like someone else’s.”

5:00  Asserting Yourself – Baseball story and a lesson from Dad.

10:00  Are you Happy?

“Grateful and very hurt simultaneously for that awareness.”

“Step into awareness with great vulnerability.

14:55  Introverted and Introspection in regards to Happiness.

16:50  Does any of this really matter?

Galactic Calendar

20:13  The Sisu Hammer

23:40  The ability to put things down.  Meditation.

26:20  Death and Surrendering

32:00  Our greatest battles are waged within.

Strengths have Shadows

37:40  Lessons from College – Seeking Adversity & balance?  Learning how to relax.

42:09  What do you do for fun?  Solitude

52:30  Understanding depression and vulnerability

56:00  Beacon of Light

“Used my endurance as a crutch and that left me holding a lot of responsibility.”

1:05:13  Something about Logan that makes other people want to get better.

1:08:35  “My ability to endure has consequences, negative ones. Im aware, we all are aware, this is a project worth solving. Not just for my own own peace but for the on paper results that are required of me as a leader. And I like that accountability.”

1:09:08  Benefits and strength of therapy

1:13:20  Relationship with Brazilian Jiu Jitsu – Purpose and Utility

1:24:40  Personal relationships – “I seek relationships that allow me to help someone else grow or that help me to grow and that largely by definition is centered around the ability to give and receive the truth which includes negative feedback.”

*1:34:00-1:34:46*

The vulnerable ones who live with dissatisfaction.

1:37:20  What is Deuce Gym?  Hold the Standard

Performance | Community | Lifestyle

1:44:18-:35  Fitness is the mechanism for teaching a host of bigger lessons, namely holding the responsibility or accountability of the space between your reality and the standard and that never ending pursuit.

1:52:28  Its chemically impossible to be a victim and happy at the same time. To take on a victim mentality is to relinquish all control of your life. You have a say.

Strength is a Choice

Challenge: Use it towards the first question.

He who has done his best for his own time has lived for all times. – Friedrich Schiller, Playwright

Websites:

Deuce Gym    Coaches Prep   Developing World Class Coaches Free E-Book

The Sisu Way

Social Media:

Logan Gelbrich    Deuce Gym    Scott McGee   The Sisu Way

11: Christmas Abbot – Pressure is a Privilege

Christmas Abbott is an author, athlete, CrossFit gym owner, girl boss, former pit crew member, entrepreneur, branding/marketing expert, speaker, and model …but these titles DON’T define her. It’s her courage, spunk, guts, and her gumption that make her a relentless human. It is these qualities coupled with her heart, that will fuel her greatest title ever… Mom.

In this episode we talk about one of Christmas’ darkest years, how she is grateful for tragedy, the collateral beauty associated with it, what helps her recover emotionally, and her pregnancy. 2018 is serving to be a transformative year, as Christmas is using her vulnerability, struggle, fire, and heart to not only empower others, but to prepare for the best thing she will do with her life, and that is to be a mother.

I am honored to hear (and share) the news and super proud of her. I hope you enjoy this side of the one and only, Christmas Abbott. 

Show Notes:

“Stopped being impressed by things, and started being impressed by people that were happy. People that made other people feel good.” – Scott

4:00  Who are you? “Work in progress. A human who wants to leave a beautiful footprint.

8:00  1996 Sister’s car accident when Christmas was 13 – Darkest years of life, as was 2017.

11:13  2017 A dark year. Learned what made of and the bigger picture

13:01  Near death experience – Mortar round in Iraq

Experience in Iraq as a female

14:10  Looks a strength or a weakness? 

16:37  Health is Wealth – Broken Foot

2017  Broke up with finance – friend OD’d – Depression – Broken foot

19:15  Big Brother TV show – Human Experiment

23:10  What helped her recover emotionally.  Service. Vulnerability. Struggle.

Vulnerability is Strength

“Saving lives saves lives.”

26:20  Connection and therapy through social media

27:07 Caterpillar or butterfly?

“Life is awesome, but first I’m going to make you strong.” -Scott

28:40  Gratitude

Whats hurting you?  Word for this year is, “Transformative”.

31:00  Slice of life that “normal people” are protected from.

32:30  Nar-Anon – support group – community that understood demons

34:00  How to be honest with yourself.

38:20  How to figure of what your Why is.

38:53  Christmas is pregnant – Her greatest role is yet to come.

41:40  “I’m pregnant

“This is the best thing I will do in my life.”

47:00  Slow Down Challenge – Pay Attention

51:46  Grateful for Tragedy – Collateral Beauty

56:00  Get Up Strong – Live and Love on Purpose – Empowering Kids

1:03:20  Loving your body during pregnancy

1:13:13  Living the life that you Love

1:14:50 Social Media as a journal

 

Social Media:

@christmasabbott, @canutrition, @badassbodydiet 

@1scottmcgee, @TheSisuWay   TheSisuWay.com

Links and References:

Beyonce – I Was Here

How to reach Christmas: info@christmasabbott.com

Badass Life Book

Christmas Abbott Nutrition (CAN) Online Nutrition Platform

Amazing Video: Alexander Tsiaras explaining human development from conception to birth

Badass Body Diet Book

 

“I hope your day gets better.”

10: Traver Boehm – Strength Reborn

Traver Boehm is a man of the heart. He is a primal man, a sensitive man, and a Man Uncivilized. Traver is a man that was completely broken by life, and decided to skillfully use the pain as rocket fuel for growth.  It is that pain that rebuilt a life dedicated to service. That service is vital to our current state of thought in regards to what it means to be a man.

This episode aims to challenge your way of thinking, and open your mind to the action of surrender, ownership, and forgiveness. We talk about service, choosing strength, soulful crying, surrendering hate and regret, creating space to think, finding gratitude, “seeing” in darkness, finding yourself, the 21st Century Man, and helping guide others like a lighthouse in a storm.  It’s okay to feel.  Vulnerability is Strength. I am full of pride and gratitude for Traver and this episode. This may be one of the most important ones I do. Because of Traver, we are One Day Stronger. 

Get Up Strong,

Scott McGee

No Man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity. For he is not permitted to prove himself.” -Seneca

Below are show notes, quotes, links, & more info discussed in the episode:

Intro: Desiderata by Max Ehrmann

3:47  So who were you?  Unfigured Out. Something was deeply missing. I was half born. 

5:21  Beautiful Death – Knowing Thyself – Temet Nosce

8:51  What moments woke you up?  “Hang on”

11:10  Meditation – Go sit down and be with yourself

12:50  Utah – Month in the Wilderness. (Boulder Outdoor Survival School)  – Discussion and lesson about forgiveness.

22:00  Service “My life would not have been ripped to shreds to be be rebuilt in a way that would be self-servicing. I am dedicated to service.”

22:40  Driven by pain or driven by love? “Pain is the catalyst that got me here.”

Balance “If your pain could speak to yourself, what would it say?”

25:44  Strength is a Choice. Comparing Down.

How do you get someone to choose strength?  Humility. Find Gratitude.

28:28  Surrender, Ownership, Forgiveness

30:00  Carrying Hate. How to surrender it?

32:00  Learning to Breathe  “Create Space”  How to meditate. Box breathing.

39:45  The Year to Live Project – 28 day Dark Retreat, 28 day survival course in Utah, volunteered in a hospice

42:00  How long did it take to journey inward while in an environment with no light or sound?

49:15 How do you see in complete darkness? Hallucinations

51:21  “If you are strong within then you can deal with anything without.”

52:52  Why spend time in a hospice? “It is a blackbelt in space holding.”

54:24  Standing in front of someone you love that is dying.

56:45  How do you deal with regret?

57:00  The 21st Century Man

1:02:30  Write

1:03:55  It’s ok to feel. Vulnerability is Strength.

1:07:45 What do you struggle with?  How to find a home.

1:10:35 Communities – Built on a universal struggle

1:11:55  Combat – Taking a throwing a punch – Man Uncivilized

TraverBoehm.com -email, text….. Reach out for help!!

How to teach kids Grit…. Get Up Strong

1:26:45   How can people in support roles help their Men?

Books:

Today I Rise – Traver’s Book

Way of the Peaceful Warrior – Dan Millman

Social Media:

@traverboehm, @1scottmcgee, @thesisuway 

Links:

Ted Talk – How to make Pain Your Guru

TraverBoehm.com

traver@traverboehm.com

http://www.traverboehm.com/category/year-to-live-project/

TheSisuWay.com

Please be sure to rate the show and give an honest heartfelt review of the show on iTunes. What you say matters, and it helps guide others who may be looking for a show like this.  I humbly thank you.

9: Lindsey Valenzuela – Strength to Give

Lindsey Valenzuela is someone you may identify as a CrossFit Games Athlete, but Lindsey is more than that. She is a powerhouse of emotion, passion, strength, and love that has had a renewed sense of purpose since the birth of her son.  Lindsey has inspired generations of men, women, and children to “Lift Like Lindsey”, to find their strength through vulnerability, and that its okay to show your emotions. She isn’t defined by her victories or loss’s, what matters is what kind of human being she has become. 

In this episode we talk about having belief in your ability to work for what you want, successes and failures in CrossFit, letting pain resonate and moving on, being true to yourself, legacies, becoming a mom, giving back, perspective on growth, what its like to be married to a law enforcement officer, and where she draws strength from.  I am lucky to record this episode with Lindsey, surrounded by loved ones, because she is like a little sister to me. This is a also a special episode to me because we learn to not only Lift Like Lindsey, but to have a Heart Like Lindsey.   

Show Notes: 

Be Strong when you are weak, Brave when you are scared, & Humble when you are Victorious. – Michelle Moschetti.

1:03  What is Autumo?  It is Latin for “I Believe.”  A motto and way of living that has guided Lindsey.

2:30  The “why” for this episode.

6:50  Believe in your ability to work for what you want.

11:53 “Take whats yours.” –Coach Kellee Roesel.  If you want something, but willing to go work for it.

13:10  “It doesn’t matter about victories or loses. It matters about what kind of human being you have become.”

13:34  2014 CrossFit experience and lessons learned from “failing” to make the CrossFit Games. 

18:12 How silly does not making the Games look now?

19:23  Victories, defeats, letting pain resonate with you, and learning to move on.

21:30  Vulnerability is a sign of Strength.

24:30  Lindsey’s honesty about her pregnancy

35:17  Titles? How does Lindsey identify herself? Vulnerability, passion, and emotions. 

38:45  Being true to yourself in the face of adversity. Being a role model.

44:15  Ability to make others feel good. Strength to Give.  Strength is more than a muscle. 

At just 10-months-old, Fritz was diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Disorder, a fatal genetic disorder leading to progressive muscle degeneration. It’s incurable though physical therapy can help re-build weak muscles, but living beyond 30 is rare. Fritz’s parents started a non-profit to raise awareness and help fund research for a cure. **Lindsey’s gym did a fundraiser to help support the family.  You can help by clinking the link below**

“Live on Purpose” – Scott

56:35  What do you want your legacy to be?

“Get Up Strong.” – Scott

58:50  What message would you want to leave for your son to find in 20 years?

“I didn’t really start living until he was born.” – LV

1:02:53  What its like to be married to a law enforcement officer and how does that affect parenting.

1:19:30  Where draw biggest strength from.

“He shows me what it means to make hard times simple.” – LV on her son. 

“Lift Like Lindsey. Heart Like Lindsey!”

Books talked about in the episode:

Daring Greatly by Brene Brown

Emotional Survival by Dr. Gilmartin

Websites:

AutumoCrossFit.com

Fritz and Friends   Please click to donate and learn more.

TheSisuWay.com

Social Media:

@liftlikelindsey, @1scottmcgee, @thesisuway, @autumocrossfit, @dro